This is the first week school's been out up here, so everyone has Summer fever it seems, and so do we! Drew's been doing so well since we've been home. Seems to be over his C-diff, done with antibiotics for that, sleeping all night again (hallelujah!) and feeling good! Since he can't be submerged in water this summer, we got a sprinkler ball instead so he can still have some wet Summer fun. Him and Molly loved that over the weekend! This weekend we also had family pictures taken--something we've been meaning to do. And as always, got a lot done around and in the house. This week we've already had a play date, gone to a couple parks, ate school lunch (a free lunch program here in Austin), went for walks, it's been great. The rain's moving in this afternoon, and I feel like it's fitting. Tomorrow starts 3 days of pretty intense outpatient testing. We'll go in for a surgery to have a bone marrow biopsy tomorrow, as well as be injected with the dye for the MIBG scan Thursday. Then Thursday we have a CT scan first, then the MIBG scan (where they'll put him out again, this scan will show us where the cancer still is on his bones). Friday we have a 2-3 hour kidney function test where I'm told we'll sit with him and collect urine and blood samples to make sure his kidneys are functioning well. All of this to re-asses where we are at with his cancer, and make sure he's strong enough to go into the transplants. If all clears, and insurance approves (still waiting to hear), we'll be admitted Friday afternoon to begin the first bone marrow transplant process. Heaven help us.
This week has been so great for Drew and Molly. For me, it's been a tough, emotional one already. Why are the "easy" weeks always the worst for me? It's so great to see him so happy, full of energy and life, yet it also breaks my heart to know what he's about to face. And I've said before how good it is that he doesn't understand what's going on, because he doesn't have that anticipation and anxiety over his next steps. Yet next week, it will make it that much tougher when he's gone from on top of the world to the brink of death, literally, and not understand why. Will he wonder why I'm allowing this to happen to him? I wish he could understand that it's because we love him, and that he'll be better off...As I struggle with these thoughts and emotions the last couple days, I feel like God is trying to show me how he feels through all of this too. It hurts Him in the same way to see His children suffer and go through such pain, but He knows its for our own good. In the same way as we are to Drew, He's not doing this to us, but I have to believe He's allowing it for own good and reasons that are yet to be revealed. I need to let Him comfort me during this terrible phase of treatment just like I pray Drew will let me comfort him. Both of us don't understand why this is happening to us, but we will get through it together! So thank you all for your prayers, and continue to ask for strength for all of us--physically for Drew, and emotionally for us--and for Molly to have a good week and not feel abandoned going back to daycare and friend's houses.
~Heidi
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